Write better examples by making them:
- more personal
- more specific
- more clearly illustrate the point you are trying to make
- brief [you don’t have time to give long examples]
Governments should spend more money on railways rather than roads.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
For example, in Tokyo, most commuters choose to use trains instead of driving their cars, since it is more convenient and punctual. If they do not get on commuting trains, most of them will not be able to arrive at their workplaces on time, and this may decrease the efficiency of many companies dramatically.
For example, when I take the train to work in Tokyo, it can save me over an hour per day of commuting.
For instance, in China and India, the governments are much more likely to invest in the construction of new railways in order to improve their transportation and protect the air quality from much more pollution. [Why are they only likely to these two countries? Is there some reason that other countries don’t do it?,…. just say that “most countries” are doing it]
For instance, since the government broadened the railway network in Tokyo, the number of cars on the road greatly decreased, and the skies are much clearer.