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Writing

CULTURE 2

CULTURE 2

It’s generally believed that success in fields such as art and sport can only be achieved if a person has natural talent. However, it’s sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or artist.

Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Comments about the task:
  1. A both sides and opinion essay
  2. This is an extremely difficult topic because it is often difficult to identify whether something is due to the genes a person is born with or the education and development they have received after birth. When a topic is difficult to explain it is a good idea to use illustrative examples.
  3. When the task information includes “such as” [such as art and sport] these are only examples and other aspects can be discussed …for instance with this topic, the writer can also mention aspects such as music or business talent

Plan:
natural talent
Key point 1: having better genes than others
Illustrative example 1: Michael Phelps who wins Olympic medals in swimming due to having a wider arm span
Key point 2: child geniuses.
Illustrative example 2: Mozart was already a gifted pianist giving public performances when he was just five years old.

learning
Key point 1: training
Illustrative example 1: Tiger Woods exhausting training schedule
Key point 2: skilled teachers
Illustrative example 2: After working hard with my tutor for three years I rose from being one of the weakest math students in my class to achieving first place in the final exams.

Model Answer:
One of the highly controversial issues today relates to whether artists and sportspeople can only be successful if they are born with natural talent or whether talent can be nurtured.  This essay examines this question from both points of view and then states my perspective, being that a combination of both is the key to success.

There are people who argue that success can only be achieved by people with natural talent. The main reason for believing this is that success requires having better genes than others. One good illustration of this is Michael Phelps who won Olympic medals in swimming due to having a wider arm span than the average person. We can also see evidence of natural talent in child prodigies who are geniuses whose natural talent shows at a young age. For instance, Mozart was already a gifted pianist giving public performances when he was just five years old.

However, it can also be argued that anyone can achieve success with the right coaching. A good example of success due to long hours of coaching is Tiger Woods. He claims that he only become the number one golfer in the world due to his exhausting training schedule.  Moreover, there are those who opine that repetitive training can make it seem like a person was born with innate talent. Take leading martial artists, they spend endless hours undertaking guided training which conditions their reflexes through a process called conditioned learning. This principle can be applied in other areas making it seem that the person is gifted yet underpinning their performance is hours of instruction.

In conclusion, I believe that both arguments have their merits. On balance, however, I tend to believe that true success only occurs when both conditions are present. Consequently, true brilliance requires a good set of genes as well as the right nurturing of that natural talent and hard work and dedication to one’s field. [320 words]

Language:
Controversial issues: highly debated issues
nurtured: cultivated, reared, developed
genes: DNA, genetic material
geniuses: masterminds, people with exceptional talent
gifted pianist: talented piano player
mentor: guru, very special teacher
brilliance: cleverness, talented

Essay writing for IELTS

ielts test answers amazon-2-front-web

7 thoughts on “CULTURE 2”

  1. Very Useful
    Is it possible in discuss and give your opinion essays to start the third paragraph (the view that I am supporting) with I believe …….. Please see below if it is possible to score 7

    Some people argue that the economic development is significant target for countries; however, others believe that medical progress is the most important aim for any nation to survive and develop. In this essay both sides of argument will be analysed.

    There are many who believe that the progress of one country’s economy is a significant for it’s development. They might argue that this could lead to have more budget to be spent on several sectors including: infrastructure and education. Take Germany as a telling example. It is often thought that this industrious country has managed to re-build its roads, stations, schools and hospitals after the World War II, by focusing on the development in industrial sectors (such as car and wine industry). This has boosted the economy and in turn several re-construction projects were accomplished. Examples like this clearly show the benefits that can drive from focusing on the economic progress of a country.

    On the other hand, I believe that the role of enhancement in the medical field is more significant for the progress of any nation. This is because through such development, more healthy and energetic individuals will be available for building the wealth of countries. For instance, via the different vaccines discovery, especially the polio vaccination, millions of children’s lives were saved. This consequently has led to have productive healthy workforces, who not only can contribute effectively to the productivity of the country, but also producing innovations in several fields, and thus enhancing the country’s wealth. To stand to reason, if countries did not develop in medical area, this might pose a grave threat to our future and existence.

    In conclusion, despite the revenue from the economic enhancement, I believe that developments in medical sector is much more important for any nation to thrive and progress as this provide any country with the basic need of development in any sector which is a healthy generation capable of serving effectively.

    Thanks for your help

    Reply
    • I know this task even though you did not include it! impossible to score without it…but I know it.
      The main issues are
      1. you have not signaled the essay will include your opinion in the introduction
      2. paragraph 2 states “progress of one country’s economy is a significant for it’s development” but you need to be saying why this is MORE IMPORTANT than other areas such as medical progress

      I do not see you getting to 7 due to these issues

      Reply
    • the question requires that you Discuss both views and give your opinion
      so you have three things to do
      1. give reasons why success in fields such as art and sport can only be achieved if a person has natural talent
      2. Give reasons why sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or artist.
      3. give your opinion… This is usually best done by stating which side of the argument you support more strongly and the reason why
      I suggest you read the model answer!

      Reply

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